


Loss

by ArcaneWeapon



Category: Final Fantasy VII (Video Game 1997)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Canon Compliant, Canon Universe, Clerith, Despair, F/M, Loss, Memories, Past Character Death, Revenge, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:02:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27891214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArcaneWeapon/pseuds/ArcaneWeapon
Summary: What are you supposed to do when everything you hold dear is taken from you in one, fell swoop?
Relationships: Aerith Gainsborough/Cloud Strife
Comments: 9
Kudos: 26





	Loss

Cloud slowly stepped into the lake, the warm water lapping at his legs. At least it was warm. Cid had said it had something to do with hot springs underground, but Cloud didn't care why—just that it was. She deserved that much. This was still all so wrong. She should have been buried in the ground, resting with the flowers that meant so much to her.

Unfortunately, that simply wasn't an option here in the Forgotten City. The ground was too hard, too cold. Everything that had, at some point, lived here was long dead. All that was left were the skeletons and the memories. It was a cruel twist of fate, that the last living Cetra had returned to her ancestral home for her funeral. Cloud hoped that might at least help her rest in peace.

He reached the middle of the lake—the water now up to his waist—where the depth suddenly plunged off below. One more step and he'd vanish under the surface with her. He knew she'd never want that. The smile on her face before the light had left her eyes had told him that much.

His back was to the rest of the group, so Cloud didn't bother to hold back the tears streaming down his cheeks. He could hardly see Aerith's face through them, but that was fine. It hurt too much to see her without the twinkle in her eye, the flush of life in her cheeks, the soft smile she always wore when she looked at him.

He focused instead on his memories of her. Cementing them in his mind. _That_ was how he would remember her.

They'd first met, all those weeks ago, when he'd bought a flower from her on the streets of Midgar for a single gil. She'd left right after, neither of them realizing at the time how deeply entwined they'd later become. Even then, Aerith hadn't been concerned for her safety in the chaos after the destruction of Reactor One. Instead, she'd smiled at him, true joy on her face that Cloud had bothered to care.

Their next meeting had been so much more chaotic. Cloud couldn't help but smile as he remembered waking up, in a field of flowers, to find a pair of emerald eyes looking down on him in concern. Despite the fact he'd destroyed a good portion of her flowers, Aerith hadn't been upset with him. No, she'd just been glad he wasn't hurt, thanking him again for the kindness he'd shown her before.

Cloud's next memory had been much more embarrassing at the time, although looking back, he viewed it instead with fondness. He'd been wearing that horrifying purple dress, his hair in pigtails as part of their plan for rescuing Tifa. Aerith had confidently selected a dress of her own before walking into the changing room, and when she'd come out… Cloud had been at a loss for words. The red dress had fit her perfectly. She'd misunderstood the shake of his head, and he wished now he'd told her how beautiful she'd looked.

His final strong memory of their time together was his favorite. When Aerith had invited him on a date at Gold Saucer. They'd somehow ended up playing the roles of the main characters in the play for that night. Cloud had gone along with it, but Aerith—Aerith had embraced it with the same passion she did everything. Seeing that—Cloud had surprised both of them when he'd dropped to his knees and kissed the back of her hand. He could still recall the feeling of his lips brushing against her skin.

After that, they'd ridden together on the gondola… Cloud's tears redoubled at this memory, his sobs causing the surface of the water to ripple gently outward from him. Aerith had talked about finding him. She'd wanted to meet _him_. Somehow she'd known—known he was still hiding. Too afraid to face the truth. He hadn't said much in response, but her words had impacted him so deeply. Even now, he could feel them nibbling away in the back of his mind, trying to make him remember—something.

His flower girl hadn't deserved this ending. She'd done nothing but help the Planet. Why was everything so unfair? Cloud would have traded his life for hers without even a second thought. Aerith had already sacrificed _so_ much, why had the Planet demanded this from her as well?

The faint sound of voices drifted across the water to him. Cloud knew he'd been standing here for a long time now. He just… wasn't ready yet. But delaying any longer would make it even harder to track down Sephiroth. They couldn't afford that. He hugged Aerith to him, one final time, the scent of flowers still lingering in her hair.

Despite his heart screaming at him not to—Cloud let go. He watched as she slowly drifted downwards, gradually growing more and more indistinct. Her hair, free from its usual braid, floated in a cloud around her head.

Aerith was gone.

Cloud used his arm to rub the tears from his eyes. The hole he felt inside yawned even wider, threatening to swallow him whole. He wanted to let it. It was so tempting to just stop caring—to give up. But that wasn't an option. They had a mission, and his team needed him. He had to push on. To be strong for them. For Aerith.

"Uhh, you gonna be alright?" Barret asked—his hand tinkering with his gun nervously—as Cloud walked out of the water and moved past him.

Tifa was watching him in concern, looking like she wanted to say something, but remained silent. Her arms were curled tightly around herself in a hug. It served as a reminder that Aerith's death hadn't only hurt him, it had impacted all of them. Because that was the kind of person she'd been.

Cloud nodded faintly. "Yeah… I'm okay."

He wasn't okay.

How could he be? How could he _ever_ be? Sephiroth's sword hadn't just passed through Aerith—it had cleaved Cloud's heart in two at the same time. The one thing in this cursed world he'd come to hold dear had been stolen from him. Directly in front of his eyes. No—Cloud knew he would never again be _okay_.

As he cradled his sorrow within his shattered heart, Cloud also stoked the fires of his rage. Sephiroth would pay for what he'd done. He still wasn't sure what Aerith had planned to do, but given the fact it had gotten her killed, it must have been important. He would do everything in his power to figure out what it had been. To stop Sephiroth, and save the Planet. That was all he could do for her now.

He knew it wasn't enough.


End file.
